Tuesday, 4 September 2007

Food porn


Watching cookery shows makes you realise just how ignored food allergies/intolerances are. Last night I sat through Nigella Express, a half hour paean to dairy and gluten (and, frankly, heart failure). Her recipe for deep fried squid could have been tweaked - substituting wheat flour for something else more palatable - for us gluten intolerants but everything else was a menu dedicated to the twin evils. A Cheltenham Ladies' version of Robbie Williams, an immaculately coiffed Nigella gurned, winked and dazzled for the camera while she poured a succession of pork chops in a cream sauce and a caramel croissant bread pudding down her throat. The bread pudding already featured double cream but, unsatisfied with the paucity of fat in the dish, Nigella then drowned the thing with half a carton more. All while swathed in a black silk dressing gown.
By now you should get the picture. Nigella Express is short on proper cooking and long on food porn. She called her pudding 'darling' as she lovingly slipped it into the hot oven and then later took it to bed with her. Accompanied by a very large cooking spoon. If you weren't overwhelmed by the Carry On Cooking innuedo, then Nigella's house should have had you choking on the sofa. The Regency facade concealed a kitchen being slowly killed by overdesign. It's the mark of a bad programme when you are less struck by the food than by background. Instead of flaunting her lifestyle (endless black cabs, glittering nights out, horsey friends over for dinner), Nigella should make something that we can all eat rather than just devour with our eyes. It was all flavour and no substance. Come back Rick Stein.

2 comments:

downesc27 said...
This comment has been removed by the author.
Jon said...

lol!! You are absolutely right. I actually started watching the food channel for humor. Not the actual jokes they (like Emeril) make, but rather at the lack of health and allergy awareness. Better to laugh than be frustrated, I say. Anyway, love your post - laughed when I saw your labels :)

Jon